Detective Brian Simonsen Memorial Act of 2022 or the Cell Phone Theft Prevention Act of 2022 This bill sets out requirements to prevent the sale of stolen smartphones. Specifically, a commercial provider of mobile or data services may not knowingly provide its services on a smartphone that has been reported stolen by an authorized user. When a user makes such a report, the bill further requires that the provider transmit the report to a central registry of stolen smartphones. Providers may not provide their services on a smartphone that is included in the registry. Additionally, the bill makes it a crime to knowingly sell a smartphone if its mobile device identification number (i.e., a number or signal that identifies a specific device) is listed as stolen on the registry; or remove, obliterate, tamper with, or alter the mobile device identification number, including by facilitating such conduct through hardware or software. Violators are subject to a fine, a prison term of up to five years, or both. The bill also requires any smartphone manufactured for the U.S. market to have (1) a mobile device identification number, or (2) anti-theft functionality that is available to the consumer at no cost.